How To Invite Yourself Over To Her Place

In Depth Reading Time: 12 minutes
How do you smoothly invite yourself over and visit a girl's place

Have you ever wondered how to invite yourself over to a girl’s place?

Let’s be honest: if you’re thinking about this, you’re thinking about something casual.

Perhaps you don’t want to waste time, skip the formalities, and get to the point. Maybe you want to save time and money by meeting casually.

Maybe you want to see if you have chemistry. Perhaps you want to find out if you are compatible immediately without spending on an expensive date. Perhaps you want to meet her without spending too much or dressing up.

Maybe you don’t have a place you can call your own. And it’d be awkward to invite a girl over while other people, maybe friends and family, are curious about her.

Whatever your reason, inviting yourself over to her place can be tricky.

You don’t want to appear pushy, creepy, or desperate. You want to respect her boundaries and comfort level. You want to make her feel safe and excited to have you over.

But how do you do that? How do you go from texting or chatting to hanging out in private? How do you make the transition smooth and natural? How do you avoid rejection and awkwardness?

Imagine this: you are on a date with a woman you like, walking in a park near her home.

You are having a great time – holding hands, looking into each other’s eyes, and even kissing in a quiet spot.

But it is getting late, and you think she is having fun, too.

Now, you have to decide if you want to go to your place or hers (which is not far from the park), but you are not sure what to do.

You don’t want the date to end with just a goodbye and a kiss. You feel a strong attraction between you and want to keep it going.

How do you suggest going to her place without being awkward? Do you have a line that works well to ask her if you can visit her apartment?

Check this one out. Maybe you have been talking to a girl for a while but have not met her because you are both busy.

Finally, she is free tonight but tired and wants to stay home. What if you could go to her place? How would you ask her if you can come over?

In this article, I will share some tips and strategies on how to invite yourself over to a girl’s place, whether you are on a date, texting, or calling. I will also give you examples of what to say and what not to say so you can increase your chances of getting invited.

Unlock the Strategies

How To Smoothly Invite Yourself Over To A Girl’s Place

How can I invite myself to her place

1. Get her comfortable.

Many women feel nervous or anxious about having a man over to their house, especially if they don’t know him very well.

They may worry about their safety, privacy, or reputation. They may also feel pressured or obligated to do something they are not ready for.

That’s why you must make her comfortable before suggesting going to her place.

You need to show her you are a fun, respectful, and trustworthy guy who won’t harm or judge her. You must create a positive and relaxed atmosphere where she feels at ease with you, even if it’s through messaging.

How do you do that? Here are some tips:

  • Flirt with her. Flirting is a great way to build attraction and rapport with a girl. It shows her that you are interested in her and have a playful and confident personality. You can flirt with her by complimenting, teasing her, using innuendos, or touching her lightly.
  • Make her laugh. Humor is another powerful tool to make a girl comfortable with you. It shows her you are fun, witty, and not too serious. It also helps to reduce tension and awkwardness. You can make her laugh by telling jokes, stories, or anecdotes. You can also use sarcasm, irony, or exaggeration. Just avoid mocking, insulting, or offending her or anyone else.
  • Appeal to her emotions. Women are more emotional than logical, so you need to connect with her on an emotional level. You can do that by sharing your feelings, opinions, or experiences. You can also ask her open-ended questions that encourage her to express herself. You can also use storytelling, metaphors, or analogies to make your conversation more vivid and engaging. Just avoid being boring, generic, or factual. You want to make her feel something, not think something.

If she’s at ease with you, she’ll more likely say yes to inviting yourself over, even welcoming you with a warm hug.

2. Do your research

Another vital thing to do before inviting yourself over to a girl’s place is to do some research.

You need to find out more about her living situation and preferences. This will help you avoid any unpleasant surprises or rejections.

Some of the things you need to know are:

  • Are visitors allowed?
  • Who does she live with?
  • How far is her place?

Some girls may have strict rules or policies about having guests over, especially if they live in a dorm, a shared apartment, or with their parents.

You don’t want to show up at her door and get turned away by her landlord, roommate, or mom.

You need to ensure she is allowed visitors and that she is comfortable with it.

Another factor to consider is who she lives with.

Does she have parents, siblings, roommates, or pets?

If there are, you must be prepared to deal with any potential interruptions, noises, or awkwardness.

You also need to ask her if anyone else will be there when you come over and respect her decision on whether she prefers to be alone or not.

The last thing you need to know is how far her place is from where you are.

You need to factor in the travel time, the traffic, the parking, and the cost. You also need to consider your schedule and availability.

You don’t want to waste your time and money on a long trip if you only have a short window of opportunity.

You also don’t want to rush or pressure her if she lives far away.

You need to weigh the pros and cons of going to her place versus staying where you are or going somewhere else.

How do you find out these things? The best way is to ask her casually and subtly without sounding like a detective or a stalker.

Flirting is a great way to build rapport and interest with a girl. It also helps to make your questions more playful and less intrusive.

You can flirt with her through compliments, teasing, innuendos, or touching.

For example, you can say something like, “You have such a nice voice; I bet your roommates love hearing you sing in the shower,” or “Wow, your place looks like a hotel. I wish I could join you. Are you like a few miles away from mine?”

Make your questions natural, relevant, and flirty. Make them open-ended so it encourages her to share more information.

3. Always agree.

Sometimes, you may have hinted that you want to come over to her place, but she is still thinking about it.

She may have some hesitations or apprehensions. How do you deal with them?

One way is to always agree with her.

If she says her place is messy, tell her it’s okay. If she tells you you can’t stay long, tell her it’s okay. If she asks you to bring some food, if it’s not too expensive, maybe go with it. If she has any conditions, say yes.

The point is to make it easy for her to be comfortable with you coming over.

Agreeing with her shows that you are flexible, understanding, and respectful. It also helps to reduce any potential objections or excuses she may have.

But that doesn’t mean you must blindly say yes to everything. You still have your preferences and boundaries.

You can say no if you don’t feel like it or it’s unreasonable. You don’t want to be a pushover or a doormat.

The key is not to make this part sound like a negotiation or an interrogation. You still want to keep the mood light and playful. You still want to flirt with her and make her feel good. You can do that by adding some humor, compliments, or innuendos to your responses.

For example, if she says, “Okay, you can come, but you can’t stay too long,” you can say something like, “That’s fine, I only need a few minutes to sweep you off your feet.” or “Absolutely, I can do a lot of things in a short time.” Use emojis

4. Offer familiarity

This means letting her know that you know her area, her neighborhood, or her interests.

This will make her feel more comfortable and connected with you. It will also make it easier for you to suggest going to her place, as it will seem more natural and convenient.

How do you do that?

Mention something you know about her area. When she tells you where she lives, you can say something like, “Oh, is that in… I know that place” or “Oh, I love that area. It’s so nice”.

This will show her that you are familiar with her location and have something in common. You can also mention why you know that place, such as having family, friends, or work there. This will make you seem more trustworthy and relatable.

Ask her about something near her place.

You can also ask her about something close to her place, such as a restaurant, a park, a museum, or a shop.

You can say something like “Are you familiar with…” or “Have you been to…”.

This will allow you to suggest going there together or bringing something from there to her place.

For example, you can say something like, “There’s this amazing pizza place near your place. Do you like pizza?” or “There’s this cute bookstore near your place. Do you like reading?”.

Then you can say something like, “We can grab a bite there.” Or maybe offer to have it to go and bring it to her.

Share something you have in common with her. Another way to offer familiarity is to share something you have in common with her, such as a hobby, a passion, or a taste. You can say something like, “You like…? Me too!” or “You do…? That’s awesome!”.

This will show her that you are compatible and have similar interests. It will also give you a reason to go to her place, as you can say something like “You have…? I have that too! Let’s go to your place and check it out!” or “You want to…? Me too! Let’s go to your place and do it!”.

5. Offer to drive her home.

Another way to invite yourself over to a girl’s place is to offer to drive her home. This is a simple and polite gesture that can lead to more opportunities. It shows her that you care about her safety and convenience. It also allows you to spend more time with her and get closer to her place.

How do you do that? Here are some tips:

  • Do it as a routine. If you see her regularly, such as at work, school, or a club, you can offer to drive her home every few days. This will make her more comfortable and familiar with you. It will also make it seem more natural and casual for you to visit her place. You can say something like, “Hey, do you need a ride home?” or “I’m heading your way, want to join me?”.
  • Use an excuse. Sometimes, you may need an excuse to go inside her place, especially if she is hesitant or shy. You can use a plausible or humorous excuse, such as needing to use the bathroom, waiting for the rain to stop, or resting for a bit. You can say something like, “Can I use your bathroom real quick?” or “It’s pouring outside. Can I stay until it clears up?” or “I’m feeling a bit tired. Can I rest on your couch for a bit?”.
  • Be genuine. However, you don’t want to lie or manipulate her into letting you in. You want to be honest and respectful of her feelings and boundaries. Women can tell if you are just using a fake excuse to get into her place. If you do use an excuse, make it obvious or joking so she knows you are not serious. You can say something like, “Can I see your collection of…” or “Wait, you said you baked some cookies, right?” with a wink or a smile.
  • Be direct. Sometimes, the best way to invite yourself over to a girl’s place is to be direct and confident. If you feel that she likes you and is interested in you, you can simply ask her to hang out for a bit at her place. You can say something like, “Let’s go to your place and chill for a bit.” or “Do you want to watch a movie at your place?”.

6. Don’t be overtly sexual

Don’t assume she wants to have sex with you just because she said yes to hanging out. Maybe she just wants to see how comfortable she is around you.

Have fun and relax when you spend time with her. Don’t be in a hurry to do anything sexual.

Don’t force anything. Watch for signs that she likes you back and wants to get physical. Only go ahead if you both want the same thing.

If nothing physical happens but things go well, you can ask her to hang out again. Next time, you can slowly try to get closer to her or make things more exciting.

And even if you’re not expecting to have sex. Bring condoms. I had chances where girls have invited me over. I was naïve and wasn’t thinking of sex. I thought we’d just be hanging out. But turns out that she’s into me. So, the night was ruined. Never had another chance. So be prepared.

7. Bring something

Finally, you don’t want to be seen as a nuisance. Even though she said yes to your invitation, you should still show gratitude and appreciation.

Bring something that she might like, such as wine, beer, food, donuts, or pizza. Choose something easy to eat and share.

This will make her feel more comfortable. It will also show that you are thoughtful and generous.

Bringing something can also be a conversation starter. You can talk about why you chose that item, what you like about it, or how it relates to your interests. This can help you break the ice and get to know each other better.

8. Play it out.

There’s no harm in trying. So, if you have a girl in your mind right now, you could give this a shot.

I’ll share below a simple interaction on how this could happen.

Me: “Hey, how’d your day go?”
Her: “Chaotic. Don’t ask. How about you?”
Me: “Doing great. So you’re about to sleep in a while?”
Her: “Not yet. I’m actually out with friends.”
Me: “You have a ride?”
Her: “I took an Uber.”
Me: “How about I pick you up later tonight? It’ll be easier for you.

Here’s what happened next. I picked her up. And while we were driving I was asking questions if there would be other people at home. Good thing there’s no one. Now, brought her back to her place and casually followed her inside.

Here’s another scenario.

Me: “So, what are you up to later tonight?”
Her: “Nothing much. Just heading home. It’s the weekend.”
Me: “How about we hang out?”
Her: “What are we going to do?”
Me: “By the way. You’re just at… right?”
Her: “Yeah, you know here?”
Me: “Yeah, I’ve been there lately. I’ve been visiting my nieces.”
Her: “How about I drop by? I’m just a few miles away. And I could get us pizza. Then I’d be out before you know it.”

I got there. I told her I was downstairs. She greeted me with a smile. I handed her the pizza. And left early in the morning.

So shoot your shot right now. But remember. Follow the steps. Get her comfortable. Get some details. Don’t pressure her. Just ease your way into it. Make it easy for her to say yes. And you can even tell her you’re on your way.

Try It Now

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