You’ve met a girl who makes your heart skip a beat. She is gorgeous, pretty, and, most of all, sweet.
You’re doing everything you can to impress her. You’re charming, funny, and generous.
You think she’ll fall for you if you just show her your best self. But there’s a problem. She doesn’t see you as a potential lover.
She sees you as a friend. A platonic, harmless, boring friend.
You may think this is better than nothing. You may think you can change her mind over time. You may think you can be the exception to the rule.
But you’re wrong.
The thing is, most of the time, women are less likely to have male friends. She will have girlfriends, sure. But a guy friend? You’re likely an orbiter trying to get her out of her pants. And she knows it.
I will share signs or behaviors that women show when they’re not interested in you. These signs are NOT direct signs of disinterest but rather are signs of her accommodating you or even stringing you along.
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Signs That a Woman is Not Interested In You And is Only Being Civil and Polite
Contents
She keeps interactions in group settings.
You may have met this woman through a friend, mutual friends, work, class, or other social situation. At first, you found her attractive. Then, you became infatuated. Then, you decided to pursue her.
What’s the next step? Get her out on a date, right?
But there’s a catch. You only see her when you go out with your group of friends. You grab food or go to a bar together, but nothing more. And when you ask her out on a date, she either says she’ll think about it or makes an excuse.
And when you hang out with her again, with your friends, she acts like you never asked her to hang out. She treats you the same as everyone else. She doesn’t give you any special attention or signals.
This means that she doesn’t see you as a potential mate. She sees you as a friend or, worse, an acquaintance. She has no interest in hanging out or dating you. No amount of persuasion can make her change her mind.
If a woman keeps interactions in group settings, it’s a clear sign that she likes you as a friend but not a romantic partner.
She asks favors
I get it. You’re infatuated with her. You think she’s the most amazing woman in the world. Guess what, she knows it. And she knows how to use it.
She knows you like her more than a friend. And sometimes, she tries to take advantage of that, especially when you have no clue.
She may ask you for a favor that’s hard to refuse, like helping her move, fixing her car, or lending her money.
Or she may always ask you for small favors, like picking her up, buying her lunch, or doing her homework.
And when you hesitate or say no, she uses her cute face and sweet voice to make you feel guilty.
And when you say yes, she acts extremely happy and grateful. She may even hug you or kiss you on the cheek.
But don’t be fooled. She’s not doing this because she likes you. She’s doing this because she can.
Because she knows you’ll do anything for her. Because she knows you won’t ask for anything in return.
Hey, no amount of favors will change her mind.
If she doesn’t see you as a potential mate, she will use you to her benefit.
She will never appreciate the good in you. She will only see you as a guy willing to do everything for her without her doing anything for you.
Ask yourself. Do you want to be that guy? Do you want to be constantly used and never loved?
Learn to say no to these kinds of women. Learn to value yourself and your time. Learn to respect your boundaries and your dignity.
Learn to find a woman who will love you for who you are, not someone who uses and takes advantage of you because they can get away with it.
She doesn’t touch you sexually.
A woman can’t keep her hands off you if she likes you. She’ll want to brush your hair. Put her hand on your chest. Check out the goods.
But if she limits physical contact to brief gestures, she will likely only see you as a friend.
I had a girl hold my wrist and pull me around whenever she wanted. I thought, oh, maybe she likes me, right? But no.
Women may let you be a little physical with them. Because hey, they like it too. But you won’t get the whole package if you’re just a friend.
She may lean on your shoulders or let you lean on hers. She may let you put your arms around her. But that’s it.
She is setting a limit if she doesn’t hold your hand or let you hug her.
If a woman touches you, it’s to keep you in line. She is making you feel like you have a chance.
These calculated touches are strategic. To keep you engaged, especially when seeking favors or expressing appreciation.
Because a woman touching a man feels good, so if she wants a favor from you, she will touch you when she thinks she wants to reward you.
She pulls away when you try to escalate.
You may think you’re making progress with her. You may think you’re getting closer to her. You may think you’re ready to take things to the next level.
But she doesn’t.
She pulls away, not just in words, but in actions. She shows you that she’s not comfortable or interested in what you’re doing.
She pulls away when you try to kiss her. It’s just like those awkward videos when a guy tries to kiss a girl, and she dodges or pushes him away. You can find a lot of those online.
She pulls away when you try to flirt with her. It’s like when you say a flirty joke, and she doesn’t laugh or respond. Or when she rolls her eyes but still smiles to keep you on the hook.
She keeps the conversations platonic. She avoids talking about anything personal or intimate. She changes the subject when you bring up something romantic or sexual.
She avoids discussing future romantic involvement like a date. Or even hang out alone with you. She always has an excuse or a reason to postpone or cancel. She never initiates or follows up.
So when a woman pulls away, it’s a sign that she doesn’t like you doing what you think you’re doing or about to do.
She doesn’t like you leaning in to go in for the kiss. She doesn’t want you to touch her or hold her hand. She doesn’t want you to pester her for a date.
Some guys even get angry when women act like this. Don’t be that guy. Don’t think that you’re giving her a compliment or a favor. Don’t think that you’re entitled to her attention or affection. Don’t think that you can force her to like you.
That’s not flirting. That’s sexual harassment.
Besides, do you want to be with a woman who doesn’t find you attractive? Do you want to waste your time and energy on someone who doesn’t appreciate you? Do you want to settle for less than you deserve?
Value yourself. And find a woman who values you. Find a woman who doesn’t pull away when you try to escalate. Find a woman who wants you as much as you want her.
She pushes you to other women.
Another sign that a woman likes you as a friend but not as a romantic partner is when she pushes you to other women.
She may do this in subtle or obvious ways.
She may point out other women who are attractive or compatible with you. She may say things like, “You should talk to her; she’s cute and smart” or “You two would make a great couple. You have so much in common”.
She may try to set you up with other women. She may introduce you to her friends or acquaintances looking for a date. She may even play matchmaker and arrange a blind date for you.
She may encourage you to pursue other women. She may give you advice or tips on how to flirt or impress them. She may cheer you on or, congratulate you when you make a move or score a date. She may act happy or excited for you when you tell her about your romantic adventures.
She may do this because she thinks you’re a good guy who deserves love. And she also does this because she doesn’t want you for herself.
She doesn’t see you as a potential lover. She doesn’t feel any attraction or chemistry with you. She doesn’t want to date or be in a relationship with you.
So don’t mistake her actions for something else. Don’t think that she’s testing you or playing hard to get. Don’t think that she’s jealous or insecure. Don’t think that she’s hiding her true feelings for you.
She’s not.
She tells you she likes you as a friend but not a romantic partner. She’s telling you that you should move on and find someone else. She’s telling you that you’re not the one for her.
She isn’t Flirting
I want to tell you more about flirting. But that’s the thing. There would be no flirting at all.
Flirting is a way of showing interest and attraction. It’s a way of creating tension and excitement. It’s a way of communicating that you want more than a friendship.
But if a woman likes you only as a friend but not as a romantic partner, she won’t be flirting with you.
She won’t be giving you any signs or signals that she wants you to make a move. She won’t be responding to your attempts to flirt with her.
You may try to initiate flirting, but you won’t hear anything from her. She may ignore your compliments, jokes, or teasing.
She may act bored, annoyed, or confused. She may change the topic or end the conversation.
Or maybe you’re not initiating flirting or don’t know how to. Perhaps you’re too shy, nervous, or clueless. Maybe you’re afraid of rejection, embarrassment, or ruining the friendship. Perhaps you’re waiting for her to make the first move.
But she won’t.
So when you’re talking to her and try to slip in a few sexual statements or innuendos, and she doesn’t get it or doesn’t like it, it’s a sign that she’s not into you.
She’s not playing hard to get or being coy. She’s not testing you or challenging you. She’s not hiding her feelings or being shy.
She’s not that into you.
She has no interest in knowing you more.
When a woman likes you as a romantic partner, she’ll want to know more about you.
She wants to discover your personality, your passions, and your dreams. She wants to connect with you on a deeper level.
But if a woman isn’t really into you, she doesn’t care about getting to know you more.
She doesn’t ask you about anything. She doesn’t show any curiosity or interest in your life. She doesn’t listen to your stories or opinions. She doesn’t remember your details or preferences.
She may do this because she has no intention of getting closer to you.
So when a woman doesn’t get to know you more, it’s a sign that she’s not really into you.
And don’t try to force conversation with her. Or push her to talk with you more so she can know more about you. It’ll just fall on deaf ears. She doesn’t give a damn.
She talks about other guys in front of you.
One of the most obvious signs that a woman doesn’t see you as a romantic partner is when she talks about other guys she likes or dates in front of you.
She may do this casually or deliberately, but either way, it shows that she has no romantic interest in you.
No, she doesn’t talk about them because she wants to make you jealous or to see your reaction.
She may talk about other guys to get your opinion or approval. She may talk about other guys to vent or to brag. She just wants a friend to listen to her.
If you ever get a woman talking to you about other guys they’re into, no, it’s not a test. She doesn’t see you “that way.” You’re not a threat or a competitor. You’re not a potential lover. You’re just a “friend.”
Wrap Up
Women who treat you as a friend either genuinely only like you as a friend or can be using you. Be mindful. If you think she’s actually nice to you, be nice back. But if you think she’s kind of using you, it’s okay to walk away.
If you’re pursuing a girl and you think she only likes you as a friend, don’t try to push it. You want something more, and she’s okay with you being a friend. If you push more, that’s where hostility starts.
If you think this can happen, the safest thing to do is to stop being her friend. You’ll have feelings for her, so better stop communication or it will just turn into resentment and nobody wants that.
If you want to escape the friendzone we’ve got you covered. How To Get Out Of The Friendzone
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