What To Do When A Girl Wants To Bring A Friend On Your Date

In Depth Reading Time: 10 minutes
What To Do If She Brings a Friend on the Date

Has this ever happened to you? You’re chatting with a girl, and she seems really interested. You’re excited to meet up with her, and luckily, she agrees.

The big day arrives, and you’re all set. You even text her that you’re at the meetup spot, ready to go. But just five minutes before you’re supposed to meet, she drops a bombshell: “I’m with a friend.”

Now what?!

You don’t know her friend, and you’re left wondering how the evening will unfold. Your meticulously planned date now feels like it’s falling apart.

This scenario isn’t uncommon, and I’ve noticed it happening more often lately.

Girls sometimes bring a friend along on a first date, which can make things awkward, especially if they end up chatting amongst themselves and ignoring you.

Take, for instance, the time I was set up with a woman by a friend. I was convinced it was going to be my lucky night. But as it turned out, it wasn’t a date at all—she had secretly invited her friends, and before I knew it, three of them had joined us at the table.

When a girl wants to bring a friend on your date, ask why and express discomfort if necessary. Suggest compromises to make her feel comfortable. If surprised by an unmentioned friend, it’s okay to reschedule or leave. Manage your reaction and don’t let the situation waste your time if you sense that she and her friend might use you.

It’s a different story if she’s already out with her friends and invites you to join them. But why do some women feel the need to bring friends on a date?

Is it a safety precaution, is it to ensure you’re not a serial killer?  or do they feel uneasy going alone?

While some people may be all about it. others find them uncomfortable.

These days, I don’t encounter this issue. I’ve honed my skills in capturing and maintaining a woman’s interest, amplifying attraction, and identifying those who are merely time-wasters. Allow me to impart my wisdom.

If you’re not keen on potentially awkward first-date scenarios, here are some tips to help you avoid them.

And if you do find yourself unexpectedly caught in this situation, I’ve got some advice to help you navigate it smoothly.

What If A Girl Wants To Bring A Friend On A Date?

What does it mean when a woman brings a friend on a date

If you receive a message from the girl you’re supposed to go on a date with, and she informs you that she plans to bring a friend along, here are some steps you can take to handle the situation gracefully.

Know Her Intentions

What does it mean when a woman brings a friend on a date?

When a woman suggests bringing a friend along on a date, is it a sign that she’s not interested in anything romantic with you? If this happens, it might indicate that she’s not quite into you yet. Let’s break it down.

  1. Early Stages:
    • If you’ve met online and she suggests bringing a friend, it’s a red flag. You might have invited her too early, and her interest level is low. Perhaps you came across as too aggressive or overly sexual. Naughty jokes? Well, they might have backfired.
    • She might claim it’s about safety or feeling nervous, or awkward, which could be true or just an excuse. But the truth is, she’s just not that into youyet. It’s like she’s saying, “Hold your horses, cowboy. We’re not there yet.”
  2. Long-Term Conversations:
    • Now, if you’ve been chatting with her for a while, pay attention. If she still insists on bringing a friend, it’s a clear signal. She’s not romantically attracted to you. You’re pushing it, my friend, and making her uncomfortable.
    • Maybe you’ve become her confidant, her buddy. She’s bringing a friend along to avoid the “date” label. It’s a polite way of saying, “We’re just hanging out, not dating.”
  3. The Unspoken “No”:
    • Most people hate saying no directly. So, they resort to actions. Bringing a friend is a subtle way of rejecting any romantic notions. It’s like a silent “no thanks.”
    • Remember, actions speak louder than words. If she’s not interested, she won’t hesitate to include a third wheel.
    • Bringing a friend can be a subtle way of indicating disinterest without explicitly saying so, as most people find it difficult to say no directly.
  4. The Power Play:
    • Brace yourself for this one. Some women know their allure. They understand their power over men. When they bring a friend, it’s not about safety—it’s about strategy.
    • In this scenario, she might use you for a free meal or free drinks. Don’t fall into that trap. You’re better than that.

So, gentlemen, when a woman suggests a friend tag along, read between the lines. Adjust your expectations accordingly. And remember, there are plenty of fish in the sea—some without extra companions.

Ask Why & Clarify

You’ve got a date lined up, and suddenly she drops the bombshell: “I’m bringing a friend.” What does it mean? Is it a sign that she’s not interested in anything more than friendship?

A straightforward approach to handling this situation is to ask her why she wants to bring a friend along. A simple message asking “Why?” can prompt her to explain her reasons.

Ask her why she wants her friend there. Does she have reservations? Is it nerves? Or maybe she’s just cautious about meeting someone from the wild world of online dating.

She might reveal reasons like feeling nervous, wanting to avoid awkwardness, or just needing to scope you out.

It’s possible she’s seeking a casual meet-and-greet vibe to gauge the chemistry, with her friend playing the role of moral support.

Consider this: she may prefer easing into your company before diving into the date zone, where the stakes—and expectations—are higher. It’s a step-by-step approach, and there’s wisdom in that.

Here’s the thing. When she suggests bringing a friend, it’s like waving a giant flag that reads, “Not romantically interested!” Or, if we’re being blunt, her interest level might be hovering around the basement.

So, what do you do? First, take a deep breath. Then, politely express that you’d prefer to meet up another time when it’s just the two of you. No need to be confrontational—just keep it straightforward.

Now, let’s talk about her friend. Why is she tagging along? Well, there are a few possibilities:

  • Safety Check: Maybe she’s using her friend as a safety net. You know, just in case you turn out to be a serial killer or something. (Hey, it happens in the movies!)
  • Trust Issues: She might want to scope you out in a low-pressure setting. Is this guy legit? Trustworthy? Not a total weirdo?
  • Expectations: Perhaps she’s not ready for a full-blown date yet. By keeping it casual with her friend around, she’s testing the waters without diving headfirst into the deep end.

If her friend agrees to leave during the date, well, that’s a win. You can compromise and make the best of it. But here’s the kicker: Maybe she’s just saying her friend will leave. Consider whether you’re okay with this setup.

And hey, if she insists her friend is sticking around, here’s a pro tip: When you order food or drinks, casually mention that you’ll split the check. It sets the tone and keeps things clear.

Give her a chance to say no. If she’s genuinely interested, she’ll find a way to make it work. You’ll chat, mingle, and—despite the third wheel—maybe even have a good time. Awkward? Sure. But hey, life’s an adventure.

But if she’s not, this is her chance to gracefully bow out. If she stays, that’s your cue to feel out the situation.

This May Put You at a Disadvantage

Even if you decide to go along with the arrangement of her bringing a friend, it’s important to recognize that this may put you at a disadvantage.

Sure, she might be hotter than a jalapeño in July. But here’s the deal: talking to two girls requires more effort and can be challenging.

Getting and keeping their interest? That’s double the effort, my friend. So, ask yourself: Are you up for the challenge?

Imagine trying to keep both girls engaged. It’s like herding cats during a thunderstorm. Can you handle it?

Some guys struggle to hold the attention of one girl, let alone two. Don’t kid yourself. The odds aren’t stacked in your favor.

Let me share a cautionary tale from my own playbook. They ended up talking to each other while I footed the bill for their lattes. Bad move, right? The woman you’re supposed to be on a date with? Yeah, she’ll spend the entire time chatting with her friend. Guaranteed.

Now, let’s talk finances. Are you required to pay for both girls? Hell no. You’re not a walking, talking free meal coupon. Unless you’ve got the charm of Henry Cavill and the sexual prowess of Ryan Gosling (and maybe a dash of James Bond), winning over her friend is a long shot. Don’t push it.

So, fellas, think long and hard. Going out with two women? The factors are stacked against you. Sometimes, it’s better to focus on one lady at a time. Keep your sanity intact and your wallet unscathed. And who knows? Maybe next time, it’ll be just you and her—no surprise guests.

Remember, life’s a wild ride. But when it comes to dating, choose your battles wisely.

Find a Compromise

If you believe that the girl is genuinely interested and not just trying to push you off the date, you can suggest compromises that might make her feel more comfortable.

After all, it’s usually better if she’s alone so that you can focus on getting to know each other without any distractions.

You can be your charming self without the extra audience. It’s less awkward, and you have her undivided attention.

If her concern is about safety, reassure her. Tell her you’re meeting in a public place and there will be plenty of people around.

You can also suggest that she choose the location or even have a friend on standby who she can call once she meets you.

Another option is to suggest that you bring a friend along as well, who can keep her friend company. This way, everyone feels comfortable and included.

In the next section, we’ll discuss exactly what you can say to avoid these situations altogether.

Steer the Conversation

When faced with the situation where a girl wants to bring a friend on your date, it’s important to steer the conversation in a way that conveys your discomfort with the arrangement.

You can express that it’s not normal for a girl to bring a friend on a first date and that you find it weird and uncomfortable.

You might feel inclined to tell her straight up that it’s weird. It’s a word often thrown around by women in the dating world, and now it’s your turn to use it. 

Use phrases like “I would find it weird if your friend was there through the whole date” or “It’s strange to me that you’d want your friend along.”

Express to her that your intention was to have a one-on-one conversation, to really get to know each other without distractions.

If the idea doesn’t sit well with you, it’s perfectly fine to say you’d pass on that arrangement. Phrases like “that’s sketchy,” “that’s a deal breaker for me,” “that’s extremely odd,” or “normal people don’t do that.” are strong, but they convey your discomfort clearly

If you’re caught off guard because she didn’t mention her friend coming until the last minute, it’s reasonable to tell her that it’s an immature move.

You can express your surprise by saying, “This is stupid and childish.”

Let her know that you’d prefer to meet up some other time when it’s just the two of you, as “this” isn’t what you had in mind.

In all honesty, if it’s not the date you were expecting, you have every right to cancel. You’re not there to provide free drinks or play the third wheel.

Cancelling might be the best option if you feel uncomfortable or if the situation doesn’t align with your expectations for a date.

Manage your Reaction

If you find yourself in a situation where a girl wants to bring a friend on your date, it’s important to manage your reaction calmly and assertively.

Picture this: you’re waiting, nerves tingling, and a couple of minutes before the date, she drops the friend bomb. What do you do? Well, ask her why. It’s not about being confrontational; it’s about understanding.

Maybe she’s genuinely interested, or maybe she’s just pushing you off the date. Either way, pay attention. And if your spidey senses tingle that she and her friend might use you as their personal entertainment, consider bailing.

Now, let’s say she springs the friend on you without any prior warning. You weren’t expecting it, and suddenly you’re in a group date situation. It’s okay to back out. Seriously, it’s okay.

You’re not obligated to stick around. If it feels off, just leave. Walk away. Don’t let this kind of behavior waste your time.

You are not obligated to continue with the date if it doesn’t align with your expectations. Your time is valuable, and you shouldn’t let this kind of behavior waste it. Don’t hesitate to leave and walk away if you feel that the situation is not what you signed up for.

Try It Now

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