Common Mistakes Men Make When Approaching Women

In Depth Reading Time: 6 minutes
Common Mistakes Men Make When Approaching Women

I went to a party with my friend the other night. “Dude, let me show you how I get chicks.” And then I saw him approach a woman in the worst possible way.

He walked up to her and said, “Hey, I know the guy who owns the place.” Clearly a lie. She looked at him and said, “Oh, okay. That’s nice.”

He then proceeded to talk about himself for the next five minutes without letting her speak. He bragged about his job, his car, his money, and his achievements. Still, all lies. She’s nodding at him politely thought.

He then asked for her number. But she said she was not from here. He then grabbed her arm and said, “Come on, It’s just a number.”

She just starts walking away. He then got angry and said, “Fine, whatever, you’re not that hot anyway.”

He looked at me and said, “Bitches, right?”

My friend clearly showed me what NOT to do when trying to meet women.

Some men are oblivious to these blunders, while others are simply arrogant and rude. They are pushy, self-absorbed, dishonest, and creepy, and they only care about themselves.

In this article, we will explore these mistakes in detail and how to avoid them.

1. Checking her out too much.

It’s pretty normal for our eyes to follow a woman that’s attractive. Nothing’s wrong with that. But it could be problematic when you ogle at her like a fine piece of meat.

Women notice when you’re checking them out. Even if you play it low-key, they know.

What do you do? Yes, it’s okay to look, but don’t stare until you’re creeping them out.

Look her way. Check her out. But you have to decide. Will you approach her, or just keep back? Because if you keep back and still ogle, then you’re just making her uncomfortable.

Another thing that you could do is to keep eye contact. Keep your confidence and start walking toward her. Say hi and tell her, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude. You look fascinating.” Then, introduce yourself and offer a handshake.

2. Not planning your approach.

Do you know what are going to say, how you are going to say it, and what you are going to do next? If not, then this can lead to awkwardness, confusion, or rejection. Imagine just standing there and not knowing what to do.

This is why you have to prepare.

Do you start talking to women with something vague, boring, or irrelevant, such as “Hi,” “How are you?” or “What are you doing here?”. This shows that you have nothing interesting or original to say or creative.

A better way to approach a woman is to use a specific, relevant, and engaging opener, such as a compliment, a question, or a joke, that relates to the situation, the environment, or the woman herself.

You should have a clear intention, too. This means that you know what you want from the interaction. This shows that you are decisive or assertive.

Have a clear intention, such as getting her number, asking her out, or inviting her to join you somewhere, and communicate it confidently and respectfully.

Then, have a clear exit strategy. An excuse to say so that you can get her number and bail. For example, “I have to go back to my friends, but it was nice meeting you. But her, let me get your number.”

3. Walking up to women at a bad angle

This can make her feel startled, threatened, or annoyed.

Just think of it this way. Picture this situation. A woman is strolling on the sidewalk, feeling relaxed. She comes to a dim and lonely area. You have no bad intentions, but you start following her from behind. How do you think she will react to you? Will she welcome you or panic?

If you block her way, she might think you are rude or aggressive. A better way to approach her is to come from the front or the side and make eye contact and smile before you speak.

4. Being overly aggressive or pushy

Most men come on too strong from the start. A loud voice. Trying to touch her without her permission. This can make women feel pressured, offended, or scared, even if you do it unintentionally.

I saw some guy talk to two girls at the mall. Inviting them to grab a bite at the food court. The girls were surprised at first but not scared. But the moment he kept pressuring them, that’s when they started backing out.

You should throw the “Come on, I don’t bite” idea out of the window. When approaching women, you should take it nice and slow.

A better way to approach her is to keep a comfortable distance, read her body language, and back off if she is not interested.

If you do not take no for an answer, such as insisting or begging, she might think you are desperate or aggressive.

Take a hint from time to time. Don’t be stubborn and clueless.

5. Being too much of oneself

This means acting in a way that is self-centered, rude, or uninterested in the woman they are talking to.

For example, they might talk only about themselves, showing that they are not curious or respectful of the woman’s personality, opinions, or experiences.

They might also be disrespectful or rude, using vulgar language, making inappropriate jokes, or insulting the woman or her friends. This shows that they have no manners or empathy and that they do not care about the woman’s feelings or comfort.

Another example is not listening actively, meaning that they are not paying attention to what the woman is saying. This shows that they are not interested in the woman or what she has to say and that they are only focused on themselves or their agenda.

They might also try to impress with material possessions, bragging about their money, car, job, or other things that they own or have achieved. This shows that they are insecure or shallow and that they think that the woman will only like them for their status or wealth.

Finally, they might ignore signals of disinterest, meaning that they do not notice or respect the woman’s body language, tone of voice, or words that indicate that she is not interested or wants to end the conversation. This shows that they are pushy or desperate and that they do not value the woman’s consent or preferences.

6. Trying for long and deep conversations

Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Get in and get out. The purpose of the approach is to create a semblance of spark or connection, not to impress her with your knowledge.

Show her some humor. Make sure she can feel your intention. Get her number and walk away.

There’s no need to know too much about her background. You can know more about her during the date.

7. Not taking things to the next level

Do you want to end up being the friendly guy but the forgettable one? She’s probably having a nice conversation with you, but you’re making the mistake of not letting her feel or show your intention.

Be a little more assertive. Make her know that you’re interested in her. A sweet compliment is enough.

Then, be assertive. Ask for her number or ask her out. That’s it.

Try It Now

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