Have you ever felt like you’re always the nice guy who finishes last?
It’s like every one of your friends is either getting a girlfriend or getting married. But you? You still haven’t found the one.
You’ve been on more dates than you can count, but none ever led to anything serious.
You always hear the same compliments from women: you’re amazing, a catch, a great guy. But then they hit you with the dreaded words: “Let’s just be friends.”
You don’t think you’re doing anything wrong.
You respect women and their boundaries. You also show interest and affection. You try to be yourself and have fun. And you also listen and care.
You don’t know why you keep getting friendzoned. It’s a mystery. All the while, you see your friends. They have no trouble attracting and keeping women.
You’re not asking for much. You’re not entitled to anyone’s love or attention. You’re not trying to manipulate or pressure anyone.
You’re just wondering why you always end up in the same situation and what you can do to change it.
Is it just bad luck? Is it something about you? Is it something about women?
Should you just give up and accept that no woman will sleep with you or want you romantically?
Let’s explore possible reasons some men keep getting friendzoned and what you can do to break out of this cycle.
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What are the reasons men keep getting stuck in the friendzone?
Contents
1. Lack of experience.
This is the primary reason why some men keep getting friendzoned.
It’s like trying to apply for a job, but the company is looking for someone who knows the ropes.
It’s not that you have a flaw or a defect. It’s just that the other guy has more skills and know-how that the company wants.
But how can you get experience if no one gives you a chance? Right?
Just like in high school. The guys who get the girls are the ones who already have some experience under their belt.
But how did they get it in the first place? Maybe they had an older brother, a mentor, or friends who taught them the ropes.
With experience, you’ll know what women want, or at least what they respond to. You’ll familiarize yourself with the qualities they’re looking for. And you can show them that you have them.
You’ll know how to flirt, how to escalate, how to handle rejection, and how to close the deal.
Even if you’ve been on dozens of dates, they don’t count as experience if you don’t learn from them.
Have you gotten any feedback from the women you dated?
Have they told you why they didn’t want to sleep with you? Or why they didn’t see you as boyfriend material?
It’s a good idea to find someone who can guide you. Ask a friend with some success or experience with women for tips.
You may not have the experience right now, but you can easily get it.
You only need to know what to do and what not to do.
In the following sections, we’ll elaborate on these qualities and skills that will help you avoid the friendzone.
2. Women can sense inexperience.
Another reason some men keep getting friendzoned is that women can sense inexperienced men.
Women can tell if you’re nervous, insecure, or clueless about how to interact with them.
That’s why some women are drawn to men with girlfriends or are popular with other women.
They see them as more attractive, confident, and experienced. Women want what they can’t have.
Women want someone with experience and who knows what he’s doing.
But how can you gain experience if you don’t have a girlfriend? The answer is simple: you have to take action.
You have to go out and talk to women, try to create a spark and get some feedback.
You have to face your fears and overcome your challenges. You have to learn from your mistakes and improve your skills.
Even a kiss could get you so far. It means that you can already reach that level of intimacy with women. And once you do, there’s nowhere to go but up from there.
So start small. Talk to women. Go out with women.
You’ll face rejections. Maybe lots of rejections. Some women may not show interest and stop talking to you. But don’t let that stop you.
Other women will give you a chance. And you should focus on them. And try to have fun, and make sure they’re having fun too.
In the end, you’ll be able to slip in funny, flirty jokes. You’ll no longer be afraid to touch women’s hands. You’ll know how to lead the way. They’ll let you kiss them and more.
Don’t be afraid. It’ll be hard. Most women will ignore you or reject you. But there will be women who will like you.
It’s like trying to find gold using a strainer. But you have to do it to gain experience. And the more you do, the more you’ll find the confidence and the right moves.
3. You give no sexual intent or not flirting at all.
Confidence is key, right? But some guys worry about rejection. Sometimes, too much.
They hold back, fearing women won’t dig some flirtation or sexually suggestive jokes. Turns out, it’s often the opposite!
Lots of guys play it too safe, acting all fragile around women, but that’s not what they’re into.
Women want excitement, that spark, to feel wanted. Being a bit of a flirt can do the trick.
So, take a chance, tease her, and drop those innuendos here and there. Find that balance between being a gentleman and making her see you as someone good in bed. It’s about being that guy who adds that special zing!
You see, it’s not about being disrespectful. It’s about finding that middle ground where you’re not just a buddy but someone she sees as intriguing. Sexually intriguing.
Make women think, “Wow, he’s so smooth. Is he this good in bed, too?”
Women appreciate feeling desired and pursued, not tiptoed around like delicate flowers.
By sprinkling in some playful banter and sexual hints, you’re showing interest without making things awkward.
Remember, it’s the confidence in your approach that often piques their interest.
4. Fear and hesitation control you.
Are you constantly getting friendzoned? Or you aren’t even in the friendzone. Why? Because you haven’t even made a move on her.
Your fear of rejection makes you hesitate to make a move.
Some men have a lack of confidence or self-esteem issues that prevent them from expressing their attraction and pursuing the women they desire.
They may be too passive or not take the initiative. They wait for the woman to make the first move or give them a clear sign.
They may act too friendly, nice, vague, confusing, or boring to the woman.
All these behaviors can lead to the friendzone because they signal to the woman that you’re not confident, interested, or serious about her.
Women want men who are confident, assertive, and decisive. They want men who can take the lead, make them feel desired, and create excitement.
But how can you be confident and show your interest? The answer is simple: you have to act like it.
You have to overcome your fear of rejection and take the risk.
You must boost your confidence and self-esteem by improving yourself and your life. You have to be proactive and take action instead of waiting for things to happen.
You have to flirt, tease, compliment, and touch her. You have to create tension, anticipation, and attraction. You have to ask her out, make a move, and go for the kiss.
You must communicate to her how you feel, what you want, and where you see this going.
This girl at the office always looks at me and smiles. I thought she liked me, but I didn’t do anything about it.
I just waited and hoped that she would make the first move. This went on for a few weeks until, one day, I found out that she was dating someone else.
I was crushed. I wondered what could have happened if I had just approached her and asked her out. Maybe she would have said yes.
Maybe we would have hit it off. Perhaps we would have been happy together. But I’ll never know because I missed my chance.
Even if a woman is physically horny for you, she’ll bail because you don’t know how to make a move. She’ll find someone who can satisfy her needs.
So don’t be afraid. It’ll be worth it. Some women may reject you, but some women will accept you. And those are the ones who matter. It’s better to be confident and show your interest than to be insecure and hide your feelings.
5. Failure to create or recognize romantic opportunities.
Some men keep getting friendzoned because they’re blind to opportunities.
They may be women who are attracted to them, even if they are. Some women will have the hots for you, even if you’re inexperienced.
There may be women already flirting with them or giving you subtle hints.
But the thing is, men don’t know how to recognize these signs or how to respond to them.
They may act too serious, too oblivious, or too indifferent. They may miss the cues or ignore the signals.
This can lead to the friendzone because it shows that you’re unaware or not ready for romance. You’re not prepared for something steamy. Women don’t like that.
Women want men who are attentive, responsive, and adventurous.
They want men who can pick up on their signals and act on them. They want men who can create excitement, spontaneity, and fun.
But how can you create or recognize romantic opportunities? The answer is simple: you have to be open to them.
You must pay attention to the women around you and their body language, tone of voice, and words.
You must look for signs of interest, such as eye contact, smiling, touching, laughing, teasing, and complimenting.
You have to reciprocate these signs and escalate them. You must create opportunities, such as asking for her number, inviting her out, or finding a secluded place.
You have to take advantage of these opportunities, such as making a move, going for the kiss, or suggesting something more. I lost many opportunities when I was young. But now, I talk to every woman looking in my direction. You only know if they want you or not if you speak to them. And it indeed is giving me good results.
6. Not Investing in yourself and your style.
Some men keep getting friendzoned because they do not take care of their appearance, hygiene, or health. They do not present themselves attractively or appealingly.
They may dress poorly, smell bad, breathe badly, or be overweight. They may have low energy, poor posture, or weak body language. They may not groom themselves, style their hair, or accessorize their outfit.
Imagine going up to a girl, and you haven’t bathed or even brushed your teeth for a day or more.
Women want men who are well-dressed, well-groomed, and well-fit. They want men who are healthy, energetic, and confident. They want men who can impress, attract, and seduce them.
You have to invest in yourself. You must buy clothes that fit, suit, and flatter you.
You have to shower regularly, brush your teeth, and use deodorant. Come on, man. It’s the basics.
You have to exercise, eat well, and sleep well. You must improve your posture, eye contact, and smile. You have to trim your nails, your beard, and your hair.
You have to show her that you care about yourself. Show her you’re a man of quality, value, and style.
7. You’re a nice guy.
This doesn’t mean that you have to be a bad boy. Being a nice guy means sometimes you become TOO nice. And that you do not challenge or excite women.
Like doing everything for her. Agreeing with everything she says. You may put her on a pedestal. Worship her. Shower her with compliments and gifts. Bro, this doesn’t get women.
All this makes is you’re trying to compensate for things you don’t have to get her.
You don’t have the skills, confidence, charisma, or even honesty to make her want you. So you resort to just being the nice guy.
It shows the woman you’re not confident, authentic, or interesting. Women want men who are assertive, honest, and passionate.
They want men who can stand up for themselves, express their individuality, and pursue their goals. They want men who can challenge, tease, and surprise them.
If you’d like to learn more about this, then click this: What Is A Nice Guy and Why Women Don’t Want Them
8. Pretending to be a friend
Some guys will try the friend route. Thinking that maybe if you become a friend, later on she’ll realize that you could be a good lover.
They think that friendship could lead to a romantic or sexual relationship with women.
If you try this approach, you’re already on the losing side because you’re already putting yourself in the friendzone.
You’re showing women that you’re not confident enough to show her your flirty or sexual side. You’re not assertive to get what you want. You’re too timid to make your move. You have no intention to even show that you desire her. In short, you’re not taking action.
You have to be more than a friend. You have to show her that you’re not just a friend but a lover. You have to show her that you’re not just a buddy but a boyfriend material.
It’s like giving other men, a.k.a your competition, a leg up. “Hey, I’m just a friend material. Go talk to her. She’ll see how good of a guy I am and choose me over you.”
That’s not how it works, bud. If a man who is more assertive, confident, and charming comes talking to her, he’ll steal your girl.
So don’t give other men a chance. Stop trying to be her friend, and show her your lover potential.
9. Making the wrong moves
Are you making the wrong moves? Are you trying too hard to impress women?
Do you lie, brag, or try to convince women that you are worthy of their attention?
Men may talk TOO much about themselves. Their achievements, their possessions, or their skills. They may act arrogant, cocky, or desperate. Should that impress her?
It shows the woman that you’re not confident. Remove all that, and what could you show women?
Women want men who can impress them with their actions, not words.
But how can you make the right moves and impress women without trying too hard?
If you’d like to learn more about this, then click this: Avoid These Common Mistakes Men Make When Trying to Impress Women
You must be cool and show calmness, humor, and charm.
You must show her you’re not needy, insecure, or rude.
Show her that you’re not trying to impress her but already impressive.
You have to show her that you’re not looking for her approval but that you’re already approved and chased… by other women.
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